My Dad forwarded this to me, and Lori I thought I would post this for your amusement.<br /><br />BIRTH ORDER OF CHILDREN<br /> Your Clothes:<br /><br /><br />1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.<br /><br />2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.<br /><br />3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.<br /> _____________________________________________________<br /><br /> Preparing for the Birth:<br /><br /><br />1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.<br /><br />2nd baby: You don't bother because you remember that last time, breathing didn't do a thing.<br /><br />3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your eighth month.<br /> ______________________________________________________<br /><br />The Layette:<br /><br /><br />1st baby: You pre-wash newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold <br /> them neatly in the baby's little bureau.<br /><br />2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.<br /><br />3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?<br /> ______________________________________________________<br /><br /> Worries:<br /><br /><br />1st baby: At the first sign of distress--a whimper, a frown--you pick up <br /> the baby.<br /><br />2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.<br /><br />3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.<br /> _______________________________________________________<br /> Pacifier:<br /><br />1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash and boil it.<br /><br />2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby's bottle.<br /><br />3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.<br /> ______________________________________________________<br /><br />Diapering:<br /><br /><br />1st baby: You change your baby's diapers every hour, whether they need it <br /> or not.<br /><br />2nd baby: You change their diaper every two to three hours, if needed.<br /><br />3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.<br /><br />______________________________________________________<br /><br /> Activities:<br /><br /><br />1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby Story Hour.<br /><br />2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.<br /><br />3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner.<br /> ______________________________________________________<br /><br />Going Out:<br /><br /><br />1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home five times.<br /><br />2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.<br /><br />3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.<br /> ______________________________________________________<br /><br />At Home:<br /><br /><br />1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.<br /><br />2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.<br /><br /> 3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.<br /> ______________________________________________________<br /><br />Swallowing Coins (a favorite):<br /><br /><br />1st child: When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays.<br /><br /> 2nd child: When second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for the coin to pass.<br /><br />3rd child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance!<br /> ______________________________________________________<br /><br /><br /> GRANDCHILDREN:<br />God's reward for allowing your children to live!<br /><br /><br />I thought that was pretty funny and had some truth to it too. I know I got clothes handed down from my brothers that mom would sew lace on to make it look more like a little girls. hehehehe<br />Anyways, hope that was of some amusement. *Smiles*
'Whenever I feel blue, I remind myself to breathe again.'